Latest News
Donations Appeal 2026 - Our funding is changing but grief doesn't wait. Click here for more information.
Understanding Grief & Loss
Understanding grief & loss
Grief is a response to loss, but there is no single way that it looks or feels. It can affect emotions, thoughts, relationships, the body and everyday life. What someone experiences may also change over time.
People can respond very differently to similar losses. The relationship with the person who died, the circumstances of the death, other things happening in life, culture, faith, family relationships and previous experiences of loss may all have an influence. A relationship may have been loving and close, difficult or conflicted, distant or estranged. Sometimes several of these things can be true at once.
There is no timetable for grief and no correct sequence of emotions. The pages below explore some of the different ways grief can be experienced. They are not intended to tell anyone how they should grieve. Instead, they may help someone recognise an experience, understand what they are feeling or find words for something that has been difficult to describe.
Understanding how grief can feel
Grief does not follow a set path. These pages explore some well-known ideas about grief and what they might help us understand.
Different emotions and reactions can be part of grief, whether a loss happened recently or many years ago.
Why grief can move between being very present and receding into the background as everyday life continues.
What the well-known stages of grief can—and cannot—tell us about bereavement.
[The myth of getting over grief →]
Another way of thinking about continuing to live with grief rather than leaving it behind.
Different experiences of bereavement
The relationship with the person who died and the circumstances surrounding a death can make a significant difference to someone's experience.
[When grief doesn't feel like sadness →]
Making room for anger, relief, numbness and other feelings, including after difficult or harmful relationships.
[In a family, everyone grieves differently →]
Why the same death can affect family members very differently.
[When caring ends →]
The losses and changes that can follow the death of someone you have cared for.
[Grieving the loss of a child →]
Grief following the death of a child, whatever their age or the circumstances of their death.
[Grief after suicide →]
Some of the particular feelings, questions and difficulties that can follow a death by suicide.
[When others don't see you're grieving →]
Understanding grief that may be private, unrecognised or difficult to share with others.
Supporting someone who is grieving
Grief also affects the people around someone who has experienced a loss.
[Finding support for children and teens →]
Information about specialist bereavement support for children and young people.
[How can I help? →]
Ideas for supporting a friend, family member, neighbour or someone else in your community after a loss.
Talking about grief
Sometimes support comes from family, friends, faith, community or other people in someone's life. At other times, it can be difficult to talk openly.
Bereavement counselling offers a confidential space with someone outside everyday relationships. A counsellor does not decide what grief should look like or tell someone how to feel. They can listen and work alongside the person to explore their own experience and what the loss means for them.